I sat there with my head down and pen moving, trying to decipher the image piercing through my thoughts.
Sometimes the most random images invade our world but with the most meaning, power and significance to our current situations in life. The other day I found myself in a box unfit for my imagination. I believe we all have boxes in our lives that we live in; ones that go untouched once seen. What i've come to realize over the past few years, especially from being a Communication Studies Major, is that so many things overlap. It is incredibly difficult to live a compartmentalized life. It's hard to say something is so and be done with it. Life is an adventure of twists and turns and connections. I experience daily thoughts of depth and confusion - beautiful thoughts, yes, but also super frustrating (and I know i'm not the only one -- thanks to a friend for pointing that out). But, for the longest time I have been unable to let myself welcome these thoughts in without some kind of tension to follow. I have been unable to realize that things just might not make sense at this point in my life (and it's absolutely okay). The truth is, my mind has been begging me to just let things go, to be still and to enjoy the mysteries of life that have once been so close to my heart.
As I was taking notes in class (the one that I didn't skip) the other day, my mind drifted; I had a revelation. I have been feeling this friction and all of a sudden it became so clear. I visioned a small box. I was crouched inside and the sides were bulging out. There was not a question in my mind as to its meaning. In each of our lives, whether we admit it or not, we are continuing to learn, grow and expand just by living each day. But we have to mentally be aware of that and allow ourselves the room to let it happen. When we don't, it hurts. It's hurts like it would hurt being put in a box that was two sizes too small.
When we put ourselves in boxes, we're only allowing ourselves to expand to the size of our box. With a strict barrier between us and infinite possibility, it's not hard to feel like you're swimming in a stream of hopelessness; being just out of reach of your true life and true potential. For the wise ones among us who created a big box, that was a smart move, believe me, but eventually we all end up with the same fate - it's not enough. A big box - a huge box - it's not enough with minds like ours; created by the Divine One.
When we put ourselves in boxes, we are essentially saying we can't be any more than what we already are. We're saying that we're done growing. We're done learning. And we're done experiencing. It's not true. Today is not the last day of our lives. Our big responsibility here is to break the mold we create for ourselves to live in. It's about re-shaping our minds to entertain new thought and to question and to learn and to be okay with not-so-okay answers. It is, I believe, about living in the gray areas of life and learning how to thrive in them despite their ability to stir our emotions and unsettle our spirits. It is about learning to journey beyond the thoughts that we feel paralyze us from moving forward. There is always a new component in every situation of life; a new opportunity to learn, to grow, and to experience something that is uniquely set apart from every other circumstance or season. Let us not become complacent. Let us not continue to live in confinement. We were created for a life that is absent of all barriers, boundaries, and boxes.
Alex