My dream of becoming a wine maker has recently been brought to the forefront of my mind and for a few months, it has consumed my thoughts.
I have had this dream since I was 15 or 16. I am passionate about evoking emotions out of people that will allow them to happily dwell in the mystery of life and just enjoy being. I draw a few parallels with wine and life. One in particular has just become evident to me. I think the way we drink wine is a lot like the way we should treat people - with patience, understanding and respect. Interpret that how you will but I find wine to be so much deeper than just a glass of liquid. It is more than a strong sniff of the nose and a soft taste of the tongue. We can learn a lot about life if we just listen with the same intent when we pause to let the wine speak to us.
I've been thinking a lot in the past two or three days about how I would like to be treated by others and in return, how I should treat others. And this thought has made me aware of what I really have been longing to write about: forgiveness. It's a powerful thing for everyone. Forgiveness is a wholehearted act. It doesn't ask anything of us. It is a gift that we can't depart from. This is the forgiveness that I can't help but impart unto others - one that is given without thinking and one that is free of expectations. Nothing in this world changes your true identity. The identity that is rooted at the cross is the identity that you can't depart from. It's who you are and it's who you will always be despite decisions or situations telling you otherwise.
It's important for us to know that it's okay to forgive ourselves when we may feel unworthy of being forgiven. A forgiveness that is only meant for us and a forgiveness that you can only give to yourself. I admit that sometimes it is hard to forgive yourself - the only one who really knows the depths of your heart. I'm not saying all we have in our hearts is bad...because it's not. I am saying that sometimes we feel things that are harsh, we do things that don't line up with our character, and we just disappoint ourselves. But it's all because we're human. We're not perfect. My sister reminded me of a significant truth the other day: we are human but at the same time we are 100% holy, righteous and redeemed.
We need to forgive ourselves in order to fully experience the forgiveness that is deeply rooted inside of us, the forgiveness that was there before you became of aware of it, and the forgiveness that will be there for every time forward that you feel unworthy, unloved, or not enough.
The biggest thing for me today is to forgive myself in the times where I find it hard to forgive others. After I do this, I experience a weight being lifted from my shoulders and I realize I don't have to take on this burden anymore. So, in every circumstance, let us treat all people with patience; acknowledging that we don't know everything, understanding; being aware of the journey, and respect; admiring the intention and the reality.
Alex